“Dear Kitty,
It is utterly impossible for me to build my life on a foundation of chaos, suffering and death. I see the world slowly transformed into a wilderness, I hear the approaching thunder that, one day, will destroy us too. I feel the suffering of millions. And yet, when I look up the sky, I somehow feel that everything will change for the better, that the cruelty too will end, that peace and tranquility will return once more. In the meantime, I must hold on to my ideals. Perhaps the day will come when I’ll be able to realize them.
Yours,
Anne M. Frank (July 15, 1944)”
Look back on your 13-year old self. What was it like? For most of us, life as a teenager means being in high school, hanging out with friends, having crushes, exploring new hobbies. At that age, our whole lives are ahead of us; bright and promising.
While looking back at your teenage memories, imagine what will it be like to be 13 years old and was told that you have to go into hiding. You will have to leave your home, stop school, cut ties with your friends, all these to be done abruptly. Imagine living in a cramped space, hardly having any windows and all your movements are restricted. Imagine fearing for your life each day.
Just the thought of it is giving me the chills. Yet it did happen. That was Anne Frank’s life at the time of the Holocaust, documented in her diary. That was how life was for millions of Jews during Hitler’s time.
Anne Frank hardly needs any introduction. Her journal, Diary of a Young Girl, is one of the most popular historical document of Shoah.
Anne received the diary as a gift on her 13th birthday. It was initially intended for personal use, to pour out her teenage thoughts on. However, on March 1944, while listening to the news, the Dutch minister (who was also in hiding along with the other Dutch government officials), announced that he intends to collect ordinary documents written during the war; such as letters and diaries. With this in mind, Anne decided to polish her diary, not deleting previous entries but making comments and updates on it, with the intention of having it published. With her father, Otto Frank, as the only survivor from their family, this was turned into reality.
The book, initially, has three versions. Version A which contains raw entries by Anne; Version B in which Anne made some updates or commentaries on her previous entries. And version C, which was edited by Otto Frank for publication purposes.
Over the years, several versions had been made with the intention of catering it to the intended reader. not to alter the contents but to filter some information. As this is a diary, it contains not just historical accounts of the war that time, but more so, it has also Anne’s thoughts on various topics which some will find sensitive and personal such as her growing curiosity about sex, her relationship with her parents (particularly her mom), her opinion about the people around her, and even her view of her parent’s marriage.
The version that I read was the Definitive version, which has the complete set of entries, even the sensitive topics. I have always wanted to have this version because for me to have a deeper and more profound understanding of her diary entries, I felt that I need to get to know her not just as a Jewish girl in hiding, but as a person, a young girl. The definitive version allowed me to see her vulnerability, her fears, her insecurities, even her humor and intelligence. Having the complete version also allowed the readers a glimpse of how their daily lives evolve around “The Annex”; how birthdays are celebrated, how Christmas feels like, how they manage to have food supplies, what their everyday routine is like.
Life in the Annex means their movements are restricted because aside from a very limited number of people who knew and helped them, no one is suppose to know of their existence; not one of their neighbors, not any of those who worked in the office. Even any of the street passersby should not chance upon seeing any sign of life from the top floors of the building especially on non-working hours. They had to make do of whatever space, time, information, and food they have on a daily basis. It was like time in the Annex is a slow torture that lasted for two years. At one point, Anne even wanted them to be found so that at least they will know the ending of their story. The anxiety must have been so real and difficult.
“Let something happen soon, even an air raid. Nothing can be more crushing than this anxiety. Let the end come, no matter how cruel; at least then we’ll know whether we are to be victors or the vanquished.” – Anne Frank (May 26, 1944).
In our time now wherein mental health is finally given importance, I kept on thinking how the mental health of all 8 inhabitants of The Annex must have greatly suffered. It must be so difficult to be suddenly denied of the life that one used to have; the comforts, their rights, their freedom. As teenagers, Anne, Margot and Peter, did not have friends for two years; something that is very important in that stage of their lives. They were forced to grow up and deal with all situation “maturely”. The adults must be weary too; wondering how to manage their food supplies, especially that latter part when it was dwindling, the security of the Annex, the future of their children if they are captured.
“I simply can’t imagine the world will ever be normal for us again. I do talk about “after the war”, but it’s as if I were talking about a castle in the air, something that can never come true.
I see the eight of us in the Annex as if we were a patch of blue sky surrounded by menacing black clouds. The perfectly round spot on which we’re standing is still safe, but the clouds are moving in on us, and the ring between us and the approaching danger is being pulled tighter and tighter. We’re surrounded by darkness and danger, and in our desperate search for a way out we keep bumping into each other. We look at the fighting down below and the peace and beauty up above. In the meantime, we’ve been cut off by the dark mass of clouds, so that we can go neither up or down. It looms before us like an impenetrable wall, trying to crush us, but not yet able to. I can only cry out and implore, “Oh, ring, ring, open wide and let us out!” ” – Anne Frank (November 8, 1943)
Reading through Anne Frank’s diary was definitely tough. But there is one thing I noticed through and through; their bravery and hope. Although Anne is the one writing the diary, I somehow got a glimpse of each of the Annex’s inhabitant’s personalities. None of them are perfect; in fact reading through it you might probably dislike a person or two, but we have to understand where they are coming from. The situation that they are in was difficult. It was two years of living in fear and deprivation. But each of them had hope in their hearts that they will soon see the light of day with freedom and acceptance. It takes a lot of strength to have that hope for so long.
After reading Anne’s Diary, I learned a valuable lesson. I hope everyone who reads it learns too especially the coming generations. Hatred should have no place in this world. We should not allow hatred and evil in any form to consume us. More importantly, we should not allow fear to make us condone hate. Fear should not make us accept injustice, discrimination.
Anne Diary is not just a story of her life. It is a story of millions of Jews who had to endure pain, suffering and death because of hate. It is the story of the discriminated. If we are not vigilant, it can happen again.
“The best remedy for those who are frightened, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere they can be alone, alone with the sky, nature and God. For then and only then can you fell that everything is as it should be and that God wants people to be happy amid nature’s beauty and simplicity.
As long as this exists, and that should be forever, I know that there will be solace for every sorrow, whatever the circumstances. I firmly believe that nature can bring comfort to all who suffer. ” – Anne M. Frank (February 23,1944)