“Oh my congratulations! That’s great! I wish I can be a stay at home mom too!”
This is what I constantly hear whenever I confirm that I am indeed quitting my job to be a full time mom. I know that not a lot of moms are given this as an option, and thus, I know that I am a lucky one. But still, the decision did not come easy, and my struggle made me feel guilty.
But please do not get me wrong. I love my kids. I adore them and I have always been a hands on mom. I call my kids from the office to check on them, ask about their assignments or just to simply say “hi”. I render absences (a lot) to accompany them to school activities or doctor’s checkups and therapies. Weekend seems so short to spend whole days with them. So it confused me as well when I got so restless with the idea of quitting my job. I mean, I should be excited, right? This is a dream for a lot of working moms, so how come I am not exactly jumping with glee? It was a year of deciding and then backing out because I had cold feet one too many times.